14 April 2015

Imagine a roadblock which is a wall of perfectly transparent AeroGel.

Here you are, barrelling down a highway at the speed limit, when suddenly you realise that you have come to a halt, so gently that you weren’t aware of as much as having slowed down.

Viola! You now have some idea of what is like to have been Gaslighted for over 5000 days by a person who is an emotional vampire: their goal is not to kill you, it’s to keep sucking away your self in order to present a fa├žade of having a self themselves.

If you have been “told,” tens of thousands of times in indirect ways (never directly: you only become aware of an increasing number of knives accumulating in your back over a span of time), that you cannot succeed, that establishes just such an emotional roadblock.

Right now, teaching a Raspberry Pi to sing is not happening. I know what needs to be done. The resources to discover exactly how to do it are freely available. It simply does not happen. Welcome to the AeroGel roadblock.

The self-righteous Psychopath who spent so much time installing this roadblock in my mind can do no wrong in their own eyes. To actually imply that their integrity is less than complete inspires a rage attack (which is not the same as anger: there is no control at all). Deprogramming each of these blocks will not take place instantly.

13 April 2015

Would a book entitled “I married a Psychopath” or the like sell well?

One of the risks here for even a strong Empath is that there are no “red flags” in the differences between feelings and expression of them (body-language etc), for the very simple reason that there are no feelings, so there are no differences to sense.

It must be a lonely, empty life for someone who consists only of an empty bubble of Ego. Yet they are the only person who could change that. It begins with genuine humility (which has nothing to do with acting humble). They need to think nothing of themselves.

This may not sound so difficult until you understand that they think everything of themselves, full time. Religion (including Atheism) is not possible for them, as the only person they worship is themselves.