05 November 2007

I didn’t do it!

This turns out to mean — on close examination — more along the lines of “I can’t (shouldn’t) fix it, why are you expecting me to?” — rhetorically, of course.

The consequences are pretty immense, because in a child, this develops into the kind of learned helplessness which becomes the core of the Victim’s role in a Drama Triangle.

Because I’m not responsible (in any way) for making a thing happen, I’m also incapable of fixing it — but that requires me to get grumpy about the “blame server” (person dubbed with responsibility) not fixing it & to claim injustice as a result.

What this means in practice is that to fill my role properly, to claim indignancy & outrage as I “should,” I wind up encouraging the problem in various ways. The social consequences of this don’t bear describing. Let “miserable” suffice.

No comments: